When someone speaks to us, a friend, a colleague, or even an author in a book, it’s easy to take their words as truth. Yet what we hear is rarely pure fact. It’s filtered through perception: the unique lens of experience, culture, and emotion that shapes how each person sees the world.
Philosopher Marcus Aurelius once said, “Everything we hear is an opinion, not a fact. Everything we see is a perspective, not the truth.” This idea remains deeply relevant today. Recognising the difference between fact and opinion can be liberating, especially when harmful beliefs have been handed down as unquestionable truths.
Facts are verifiable and objective.
Opinions are interpretations shaped by emotion or bias.
In therapy, this distinction matters. A client might say, “I am a bad person.” Taken as fact, this belief can fuel depression or anxiety. Seen as opinion, it becomes a thought to notice, challenge, and reframe.
Perception is how we interpret reality through our senses and experiences. Two people can read the same book and walk away with entirely different conclusions. This doesn’t mean one is wrong; it means each is seeing through their own lens.
When we forget this, conflict often arises. We assume our perception is the truth, and theirs must be false. Recognising perception as subjective helps us step back, soften defensiveness, and open space for dialogue.
Personal Insight: Recently, I noticed someone else’s opinion affecting my mood. At first, it felt uncomfortable — squirmy, even. But then I stepped back and thought: “This is their lens, not mine.” Their lived experience is different from mine. We are shaped by all our pasts, so assumptions and opinions naturally differ. Seeing it this way allowed me to stay curious rather than reactive, and to explore what their words stirred up in me without taking them as truth.
Cognitive reframing (or restructuring) is used in CBT to challenge unhelpful thoughts and replace them with balanced ones.
Try this:
This shift reduces shame, restores agency, and helps you separate external opinions from your internal truth.
In daily life, distinguishing facts from opinions often requires a curious and critical mind:
Mini Exercise: When you hear a statement that provokes strong feelings, pause and write:
Close your eyes and imagine standing in the centre of a circle.
Around you, people hold coloured lenses. Each lens represents their perspective.
As they speak, their words pass through the lens before reaching you.
Repeat the mantra: “Their lens is not my truth.”
Critical Thinking Check
Look for credible sources before forming a conclusion. Write down the claim, research it, and decide for yourself based on evidence. This protects your mental space from unverified beliefs, especially in social media or casual advice.
Pause and Label
When someone’s words affect your mood, pause and ask: “Is this fact, or is this opinion?” Labelling it helps create space between their perception and your truth.
Curious Inquiry
Instead of reacting immediately, ask questions respectfully. Note what sparks discomfort or curiosity, and reflect later with a journal or peer research.
